Where do I start about this day? I guess from the beginning. I’m still processing some of the things that happened on this day, so I won’t go into too much detail except to say that it was a painful day. I tried to keep it together and I tried to keep my wall defenses up and at the end, I just could not. I took the day from work on this day. I needed the solitude, the downtime, the space without kids (not mine), and just some time not to just be on the go-go-go or have to answer to anyone at work.
However, as if I couldn’t help myself, I offered this day as a possibility to meet with a friend for lunch. It was a gorgeous day. I had the day off. Everything was right, but me. Even my friend was cheerful, as we shifted our relationship to a different one. I was sad, disappointed, hurt, guilt-ridden, and somehow I managed to channel all that sad, pathetic energy into these drawings to try to avoid facing the real emotions, but it didn’t work because I still cried at the Bart station. Ah well. So much for not going into too much detail!
Later that evening, I forced myself to go into dance class, because that keeps me from going into a downward spiral.
There goes my day off.